Should I Tell My Spouse About Struggles With Sexual Purity -- By: Garrett Kell
JDFM 4:2 (Fall 2014) p. 146
Should I Tell My Spouse About Struggles With Sexual Purity1
Garrett Kell grew up in Berkeley Springs, WV. He attended Virginia Tech where he came to know the Lord through the witness of a friend and the ministry of Campus Crusade for Christ. Garrett served as the evangelism pastor at Denton Bible Church in Denton, TX while working toward his ThM from Dallas Theological Seminary. Garrett then served as the senior pastor at Graham Bible Church in Graham, TX for seven years. He later spent time on staff with Capitol Hill Baptist Church who helped place him with Del Ray Baptist Church. He is married to Carrie and together they have four children, Eden, Haddon, Phoebe, and Graham. Garrett enjoys hanging out with his family, watching sports and occasionally doing some type of exercise.
“Should I tell my wife?”
Daniel leaned back with no interest in the meal before him. He’d looked at racy pictures again and the weight of conviction was inescapable. He had confessed his sin to God and to me, but should he confess it to her?
What would you tell Daniel?
Because every couple is different, there is no one-size-fits-all answer to this question. Some couples are totally transparent with each other, while others find it best to allow accountability to be handled by trusted friends. Regardless of where you land on the spectrum, it is important for husbands and wives to develop a plan to help each other fight sexual temptation.
What follows are seven principles to help you and your spouse wade through this sensitive area together.
JDFM 4:2 (Fall 2014) p. 147
1. Help Each Other Make It To Heaven.
“Exhort one another every day, as long as it is called “today,” that none of you may be hardened by the deceitfulness of sin.” Hebrews 3:13
My chief calling as a husband is to help my wife love Jesus more. My wife has the same responsibility toward me. In fact, I would suggest that the most weighty and wonderful responsibilities in marriage is to help our spouse make it to heaven. One of the ways to make this happen is by doing whatever we can to help them fight off temptation, including sexual temptation (Heb. 12:1-2; James 5:19-20). We are to be each other’s greatest allies in the journey toward the heavenly city (Rev. 21-22).
Satan will oppose your efforts with all he’s got, but you must not lose sight of this fact: your greatest responsibility as a co...
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